Making Your Marx

Yesterday I went to the Goodwill on my typical semi-annual search for clothes I don’t hate, and, as always, I rewarded my diligent trying-on of sweaters with a trip to the back of the store—where they keep the electronic and kitchen-gadget castoffs of generations, the books about the threat of a Soviet Africa, the goldenrod-orange-and-olive velvet loveseats, etc.

There were more board games back there than I had ever seen in this Goodwill before, including “Cranium,” which is award-winning but harder than you’d expect; three sets of “Candyland,” but the most recent version of it, and so not nostalgia-inducing; four versions of “Trivial Pursuit”; and, in the back, sandwiched between two panoramic puzzles, a board game called “Class Struggle.” I immediately pulled it off the shelf, hoping for greatness. I was not disappointed.

The cover displays, against a black background, a cut-out photo of a man smiling at the camera and arm wrestling another man, whose head has been replaced by a photo of the head of a grandfatherly and earnest Karl Marx. This was enough to get me to buy the game (for $2.99). I learned the following after opening the still-sealed box upon my return home.

“Class Struggle” was manufactured by a small organization (appropriately named “Class Struggle, Inc.”) in 1978. The game is meant to simulate the real-life struggle between “capitalists” and “workers.” It features two kinds of money— “credit money” and “debit money” (how this relates to real life in 1978 is a mystery; would "debit money" be like an I-bond?)—and two kinds of “growth/asset cards,” which can be used to incite or to quell rebellion, depending on your loyalties. At the beginning of the game, the “genetic die” is rolled, assigning each person to a class; the game’s instructions point out that this is just like real life, in which people do not get to choose the circumstances into which they are born.

The board itself is a spectacular grid of alternating cerulean blue and fuchsia squares so bright that they appear to vibrate (probably with suppressed working class rage). No frilly paths through wooded glens or over bridges a la “The Game of Life” (in which you are assumed to be a capitalist pig); no tasteful, minimalist black-and-white as in “Othello” (modernist aesthetics are for the bourgeouisie); none of the absurd whimsy of the ridiculously complicated “Mousetrap” will distract you from the purpose of playing “Class Struggle.” Marxism is a serious business, and this is a serious (Marxist) board game.

“Class Struggle” emphasizes this point with a “nuclear war” square only two tiles from the finish line (if a giant square in the center of the board could be called a “finish line”). For reasons best left to tournament-level players to know, if the workers land on “nuclear war” first, disaster is averted; if the capitalists land there first, the game ends automatically, presumably because the world has exploded. The rules are unclear on whether the workers win by default in this case, or whether everyone is simply dead. If everyone manages to avoid the nuclear war square, or if the workers land there first, the winners arrive in the center of the board, achieving either “Barbarism (Capitalists win)” or “Socialism (Workers win).” The rules do not explain what is meant by “Barbarism,” exactly; I think we can all assume it can’t be anything good.

But “rules” here refers to the first set, or “beginner’s rules,” which are one of three sets: the beginner’s, the full set, and the tournament rules, each of which are detailed in their own manual. The beginner’s manual includes what amounts to a Marxist history of the world (and predictions for its future), but for those who simply want to play, the rules are summarized all IN CAPS. At the end of this rulebook is a note from the creator of the game that begins by earnestly requesting that you wait until after you’ve played the game to continue reading.

Of course, having paid almost three dollars for this game, I felt entitled to ignore the plea, and read the note immediately. Here is the note in its entirety:

“Dear Friend,

Please do not read the rest of this letter until you have
played the game…

Now that you have played “Class Struggle’ (and if you have enjoyed it), you may be asking ‘What can I do to get “Class Struggle” into the hands of more people?’. The answer is that you can do a lot that is beyond the power of our limited distribution network. You can, for example, show your copy of the game to local book, toy, game, stationary, gift, department, and magazine stores, and encourage them to order. The back cover of the box tells most of the story.

With you allied to us, we cannot lose…nor can you.

Yours In Struggle,
Bertell Ollman
(For Class Struggle, Inc.)”

Well I, for one, think that about says it all. And I feel I’ve done my part by letting you all know that “Class Struggle: the Game” is out there, ready to do its part for the coming revolution.

If anyone would like to borrow my copy of the board game to show to your local magazine store, just let me know.