Monday, April 21, 2008

I'm going on a bender.

Tonight, I find myself hungry. Not just "my stomach is knotting up and I need a snack to calm it," actual hunger, but that "I feel a great need to consume the Earth on which I stand"-type hunger. I am not surprised. This is what follows the anorexia.

Many of you may breathe a sigh of relief at this news. I hear the Marge-Simpson-like tone in your voices when I report my eating habits; I know you've been worried.

Worry no more. Tonight, when I get off work -- in mere minutes! -- I plan to eat at least four varieties of not-so-good-for-you foods, including but possibly not limited to an egg salad sandwich cooked in olive oil; garlic-and-herb cheese similar to what was served at my brother's rehearsal dinner; black bean dip; Doritos. I may finish it off with a glass of skim milk.

Now the vegans can begin worrying.

3 comments:

Sarcinae said...

So how did it go? What was the final menu?

Alicia said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Alicia said...

Sadly -- though expectedly -- I only got through half my menu. I did make an egg salad sandwich, but only ate 2/3 of it, with probably an ounce of Doritos. I did wash it down with a cup of skim milk.

I'll do better next time, I swear.